Well, it is no easy task to find a positive solution for the current news in America. I pretty much thought all of our leaders and those in power just flat sound "out to lunch." Then the idea hit me, if I could take a few of these people "out to lunch" just to chat, what I would say and perhaps it would give them a new perspective or maybe they could explain to me, in a way I could understand just what it is that they are thinking. Who knows if it would help, in either direction, but lunch, it couldn't hurt!
First, I'd have to go to lunch with Condoleezza Rice, just for some girl talk. You know, it would be one of those things of letting her know in a friendly way, just what the lowdown was. Let her know what I've been hearing . . . most of the leaders of other countries think she needs a man in her life or maybe the ticking of her biological clock is affecting her attitude. I think I'd try to introduce her to a nice guy, or encourage her to have dinner with a man and discuss something other than nuclear weapons and humanitarian funding.
I'd of course want to take the President to lunch. I'd tell him a few of us are catching on to this "fuzzy fine line" between security and captivity. And this security policy with the usual mantra about "nothing to hide," seems a bit hypocritical to have "sealed archives" for public officials like your dad, when I; a private American citizen discover my calls are accessible to the "party line."
I'd also like to take General Hayden out to lunch. I realize with this new spy club of shared information, it's just a wonderful opportunity for you, but so far all of this spy work seems to just enable the Washington powers to keep track of the American citizens. I thought you guys were playing "I Spy" to catch the bad guys. If Bin Laden can send videos and his second in command has been captured and released [by mistake?] in Iraq, are you sure this spy business is working? All the possible attacks that have been averted are a bit intangible, kind of like the fisherman that tells us about the "one that got away." There were no attacks on America between 1941 and 2001, before all these agencies were "in business." Oh, and just for the record, Hawaii wasn't one of the United States in 1941.
Then, I would have to take Patrick Kennedy to lunch. I would tell him, "listen Patrick, may I call you Patrick . . ." this taking responsibility for something dumb doesn't work for democrats. I know you've seen it done and the republicans do make it look easy and even heroic, but it isn't. You come from a long line of people in public service with weaknesses that some of the public just loves to feed off of, so get dried out and sobered up or get out of the limelight, because they are just going to be waiting. I've already read a report comparing "the differences" in your situation to Rush L. You don't really want to sound like him, do you?
Before we can do lunch, I have to make sure they can accept if I pick up the check, which I am willing to do, to have my say. It used to be we could just vote to have a voice in decision making policy, but the lobbyists have sure changed that, so I don't want to start a new Abramoff situation for any of us. Wonder if these lunches would be 100% deductible on my taxes? Oh well, even if they aren't, I'd sure like our leaders to get a new perspective, so that we, as Americans, can enjoy our lives as we work hard trying to live and be free.
And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labor, it is the gift of G~d.
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